Jun. 17th, 2014

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loitering is basically the illegal act of existing while not spending money

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Sometimes I’ll just get really into girls and I’ll start to wonder if I’m just a lesbian who’s been lying to herself even more than she originally thought but then I’ll see a super hot guy and I’m like “Nope I definitely like both”

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Fancast: Aldis Hodge as Tony Stark

#marvel#genius billionaire playboy philanthropist#oh my goddddddd#i’m automatically a million times more interested in rich kind of dickish superheroes when they are poc tbh#because like imagine being a little black boy growing up so so so smart and so so so alone#half your teachers dismissing you when you get bored and restless because you already KNOW all this stuff#and focusing on your disruptive behaviour that results from that combination of boredom and loneliness#you grow up without any real peers because the other kids at your rich fancy private school are all white#and nobody would ever dare say anything but you’re self-conscious anyway#so you deal with it by being as outrageous as possible because then at least you can control why they look at you askance#your dad’s been trying to prove himself to long gone heroes for as long as you can remember#and your mother loves you but she doesn’t always understand you#they die young and you go off the rails and it doesn’t even sting that they all think you’ve proven them right#because you kind of believe it as well#you’ve grown up never seeing a black boy on the television who wasn’t violent#and even when you get straightened out some with help from rhodey there’s a long fucking way to go#but you reach out and you /demand/ respect because you’re angry and you want justice for all your wrongs#the media never really accept you; they’re hungry for more of your misadventures so they can paint you like a villain#I COULD GO ON BUT I DON’T THINK IT’LL FIT IN THE TAGS

{via peppermoonchilds}

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Shout out to all the girls accosted by questions about the logos they display, whose remembrance of plot points was not perfect, who tripped over their own words, and who through no fault of their own cemented the stereotype of the ‘fake geek girl’ in the mind of some gatekeeping asshole man.

Shout out to all the girls who love games and comics but who don’t engage with them like the mainstream, who read or play casually, or who absorb the gestalt and care less about the details.

Shout out to all the girls who aren’t able to shut down the men who spring pop quizzes on them just for having the wrong insignia splashed across the chest that brands them a fake in the eyes of the subculture they wish to engage with.

Geekery is your domain as well, and you are no less entitled to it for not being a walking encyclopedia with instant recall.

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“Real magic can never be made by offering up someone else’s liver. You must tear out your own, and not expect to get it back. The true witches know that.”
- The Last Unicorn, Peter S. Beagle (via byzantienne)
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labels can be helpful and validating for a lot of people and the whole “labels are for soup cans” deal is gross and erasing bullshit but at the same time it’s okay if you’re cool just being a big blob of wibbly wobbly gendery wendery stuff

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Pitch, Bitch! is an exhortation and a resource. We wanna close the “confidence gap” and the gender disparity in pitching and getting published. Here you will find advice, enthusiasms and conversations about being a female writer.Female writers: go forth heartened and equipped and encouraged. 

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[Top image is a pie graph titled “What We Mean When We Say “Disabled”“, with the two equal majority sections being “can’t do the thing” and “need assistance or accommodations to do the thing” with about a 6th of the chart being “doing the thing will cause us pain or stress”.

The bottom image is a pie graph titled “What Abled People Think We Mean By “Disabled”. It is monochrome and labelled “we’re lazy shits”.]

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having your favorite character be a minor character is like being a proud mother at a school play and cheering every time your kid comes on stage even though they’re playin the part of tree #3

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Study Reveals It Costs Much Less to House The Homeless Than to Leave Them on the Street

Not only is it morally wrong to let people live desperately on the streets, but it doesn’t make much economical sense either.

A new study has found that it’s significantly cheaper to house the homeless than leave them on the streets.

University of North Carolina Charlotte researchers released a study on Monday that tracked chronically homeless adults housed in the Moore Place facility run by Charlotte’s Urban Ministry Center (UMC) in partnership with local government. Housing these people led to dramatic cost savings that more than paid for the cost of putting them in decent housing, including $1.8 million in health care savings from 447 fewer ER visits (78% reduction) and 372 fewer hospital days (79% reduction). Tenants also spent 84 fewer days in jail, with a 72% drop in arrests.

Moore Place cost $6 million in land and construction costs, and tenants are required to contribute 30% of their income (mainly benefits) towards rent. The remainder of the $14,000 per tenant annually is covered by donations and local and federal funding. According to the UNCC study, that $14,000 pales in comparison to the costs a chronically homeless person racks up every year to society — a stunning $39,458 in combined medical, judicial and other costs.

What’s more, Moore Place is enabling the formerly homeless to find their own sources of income. Without housing, just 50% were able to generate any income. One year after move-in, they’re up to 82%. And after an average length of 7 years of homelessness, 94% of the original tenants retained their housing after 18 months, with a 99% rent collection rate.

The general population is biased: The original proposal for Moore Place was “controversial, if not ridiculed,” according to the Charlotte Observer. Locals mocked the idea that giving the homeless subsidized housing would do any good. A 2011 report commissioned by the Los Angeles Homeless Services Authority found that people have condescending attitudes towards the homeless, with the public perceiving higher levels of substance abuse problems (91%) and mental health issues (85%) than reported by the homeless themselves (41% and 24% respectively). It concluded that if “personal failings as the main cause of homelessness, it is unlikely that they will vote for increased public assistance or volunteer to help the homeless themselves.”

But “you can’t argue with the statistics," said UMC housing director Caroline Chambre. “This approach was controversial at one time because of the stereotype of who the homeless are, and we had to change that stereotype.”

In 2012, total welfare spending for the poor was just 0.47% of the federal budget. It turns out that maybe if we spent a little more to help the chronically destitute solve their problems, we could save a lot of money.


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this is funny

like really, really funny

My BF had to explain it to me and now I feel like an idiot as he laughs his fucking ass off.

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the idea of two aromantic platonic partners having a “convenience marriage” is like my favorite thing right now I’m both getting really excited and cracking up over the possibilities I mean just imagine:

"we got married because of tax benefits"

"we got married because it gave us an excuse to have sleepovers every night”

"we got married because it seemed convenient to ‘pool our assets’ (aka our library is now twice as big, as is our collection of Disney movies)"

"we got married because it gave us an excuse to ask for toasters from people as wedding gifts"

”we got married because i really like her last name and we thought marriage would be the easiest way for me to take it”,(cisphobeofficial)

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i’ve been meaning to make this post for a while, but um jokes about “natural selection” and “weak bloodlines” and shit? those are ableist. those are eugenics jokes. you’re joking about disabled people being too weak too survive. so like…stop.

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Me: So, let's say that you're at school and you see a guy you know. I mean, you guys talk every once in a while and he's pretty cool, but you're not like friends or anything. You just talk to him every once in a while.
Guy Friend: What's his name?
Me: I don't know. Frank?
Guy Friend: No.
Me: Okay, fine. His name is Will. Okay?
Guy Friend: I don't think it really suits him, but okay.
Me: ...So anyway, you're at school during lunchtime and you see Will. So, you notice Will's not eating anything. That's when you realize that Will has no lunch, no money for lunch, and no way of getting either. He's just sitting there like he normally would. He's not acting any differently and he's not asking anyone for anything. Not money, not a fry, not even a salt packet, but you know he's gotta be hungry. So, what do you do?
Guy Friend: Do I have any money?
Me: Yeah. You have enough for you and another meal.
Guy Friend: Duh, I buy him lunch.
Me: Okay, cool. So, like you said, you buy him lunch. You buy your lunch and you buy his lunch and you go over and hand it to him. And, he says, "Wow. You know, that's really nice of you, but I wasn't gonna ask anyone for lunch. I was probably just gonna wait until I got home to eat." And, then you say--
Guy Friend: Nah, it's cool.
Me: Exactly. You say, "Nah, it's cool. I'm just being nice. It's a gift." And, Will says, "You know, that's awesome. You're really nice, bro." And, after that, you guys start hanging out. You guys are like really good buds. You are always hanging out and laughing and just having a good time. So, you guys are friends for a few months, and it's tons of fun. Then, one day, you go up to Will and you say, "Hey, Will, you know, I've been thinking, and I kinda want that five bucks."
Guy Friend: What five bucks?
Me: Hold on. I'm getting there. So, Will says, "What five bucks?" To which, you reply, "Well, we've been hanging out for a long time and it's been really fun, but like, I've done a lot of really nice things for you. Like, I'm always nice to you and I always listen and do things you wanna do, so I was thinking that because I've been so nice, you should pay me back that five bucks I spent to get your lunch right before we started really hanging out."
Guy Friend: What? Why would I--
Me: I'm not done yet. So, then Will looks kinda hurt and he says, "But I thought you were just being nice. I thought that was just a gift." So, you say, "Whether or not it was a gift, don't you think you kinda owe me that five bucks since I've been so nice to you?" And, Will says, "No. I don't think I owe you that!" And you get mad, so you say, "Well, I think that you do, so I think you're being really shitty and stuck up about this and I feel like I've been completely wronged."
Guy Friend: Oh, my God. That's so fucked up of me. I would never do that to Will. Will was nice. We were buds. That's way screwed.
Me: I know, right? Hey, just wondering, have you ever heard of this fictional place called "The Friendzone?"
Guy Friend: Well, yeah, but...
Guy Friend: ...
Guy Friend: ...
Guy Friend: oh
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We used to have a term in the autistic community, we called it ‘cousins’.

It started when Xenia Grant was talking to a guy who had hydrocephalus and had a lot in common with autistic people, but was not autistic.  She took a look at him and happily exclaimed, “Cousin!”

(I like to keep track of who coined terms.  It can be meaningful.  Xenia is the friendliest person I’ve ever met, autistic or nonautistic.  That’s the spirit that ‘cousin’ started in.)

Back when NT meant a nonautistic person, another abbreviation cropped, up, AC.  AC meant “Autistics and Cousins” and covered autistic people and… cousins.  So you’d talk about “ACs and NTs”.  But who were cousins?

Cousins were people with a neurological condition other than autism, but it gave them important things in common with autistic people.  Especially sensory processing, cognitive, and social traits in common with us.

Cousinhood wasn’t something that was based on a condition.  It was based on how that condition worked for a particular person.  So while sometimes we’d talk about ‘cousin conditions’, there was no condition where everyone with it was a cousin.

But some common cousin conditions included:  Tourette’s, hydrocephalus, OCD, schizophrenia, and AD(H)D.  Just as some examples.  Not everyone with those conditions was a cousin, but lots of cousins had those conditions or related ones.

The cool thing about cousin was that it dealt with the ambiguity of life.  It made it so that it wasn’t just ‘us and them’.  There was a broad hazy area around autism where people could be considered in many important ways ‘like us’ without being autistic.

Two people on tumblr that my brain automatically classifies as cousins are karalianne and lichgem.  (That’s assuming they’re not unknowingly autistic, of course.  Some people think of themselves as cousins but turn out to actually be autistic.)  I don’t see them as outside of the circle I draw around ‘autism’ for social purposes, because I draw that circle at the ‘cousin’ level rather than the ‘autism’ level.  

I kind of wish that most identities had this ‘cousin’ thing going, because it would resolve a lot of boundaries that people want to be strict and are not.  It deals with people who are a lot like a certain type of person, without exactly being that type of person.  And it does so in a really friendly and welcoming way.

I know that Tourette’s has a similar but not quite the same idea, called “Tourette’s Plus”.  Where the “Plus” conditions are conditions that people with Tourette’s often have in addition, like autism or OCD.  Not quite the same idea, but similar.

Eventually people started deciding that the problem with ‘cousin’ was that it made ‘autistic’ the center of the neurodiverse landscape, and that this wasn’t fair.  And maybe it wasn’t fair.

But still, I miss the days where you could say “AC” or “Cousin” and people would know what you meant, immediately.  And where cousins were considered an actual inside part of the autistic community, not just “allies”.  I know there are parts of the autistic community where all of this is still the case.  But not nearly as many as there used to be.

So I’m throwing the idea out there just in case anyone likes it as much as I do.  It’s not my idea, I didn’t think it up, it existed long before I even knew there was an autistic community (and I go pretty far back compared to a lot of people these days).  But I think it’s a useful idea, in some contexts, as long as you do keep in mind that autistic people aren’t the center of neurodiversity.

(But honestly I think if all neurodiverse people used the ‘cousin’ idea in their own communities, then it wouldn’t be about autism-at-the-center anymore it would just be a useful idea for people who are very similar to you in important ways without being quite the same.)

Anyway… Karalianne was talking about how she feels sometimes like she can’t even talk about certain things without qualifying them a lot, because she’s not autistic, and she’s afraid of encroaching.  And I remember a time when she was not considered encroaching because everyone knew she was a cousin and that was her place in the community and nobody (that I know of) ever questioned it back then.  And it upsets me that this is not the case anymore.  Because she totally is one of the first people to spring to mind when I think ‘cousin’.

And I wish that Xenia’s exuberant friendliness would somehow infect the term ‘cousin’ once again, because it needs that push.

Astra, I don’t know if you’ve seen this yet, but I think you might find this term useful?

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As I spoke about in my post, when I was a young babygay, many of the LGBT YA novels I found were all about the angst and trials of coming out. Which is all well and good, but those can’t be the only narratives queer people see themselves in. So, I compiled this list.

I had three criteria:

Coming Out could be a part of the plot but could not be the whole focus (which is why Ask the Passengers, even though it’s good, isn’t on here, before you ask)

The protagonist/MC had to identify as queer/LGBT. No sidekick stories here.

The story could not be known to be biphobic or transphobic (which is why The Bermudez Triangle isn’t on here, also before you ask. Also bisexual-books has a great response to that book in particular, but this is not the place for that discussion.)

If you believe a novel on this list falls into the categories of bi- or transphobic or otherwise, please message me and I’ll look into it/remove it.

This is by no means a comprehensive list—feel free to reblog and add suggestions or message me with suggestions so I can keep updating!

The List is also on Goodreads!!


Realistic Fiction: Lesbian MC

The Summer I Wasn’t Me by Jess Verdi

The Miseducation of Cameron Post by emily m. danforth

Everything Leads to You by Nina LaCour

Great by Sara Benincasa

Scars by Cheryl Rainfield (huge trigger warning for self harm and sexual abuse for this book, FYI. It is a wonderful book, though.)

Lies We Tell Ourselves by Robin Talley

If You Could Be Mine by Sara Farizan

Starting from Here by Lisa Jenn Bigelow

A Love Story Starring My Dead Best Friend by Emily Horner

Gravel Queen by Tea Bendhun

Fat Angie by E.E. Charlton-Trujillo

Lies My Girlfriend Told Me by Julie Anne Peters

Realistic Fiction: Gay MC

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz 

Gone Gone Gone by Hannah Moskowitz 

Openly Straight by Bill Konigsberg

Realistic Fiction: Transgender MC

Parrotfish by Ellen Wittlinger

Beautiful Music for Ugly Children by Kristin Cronn-Mills

Realistic Fiction: Bisexual MC

Far from You by Tess Sharpe

Empress of the World by Sara Ryan (though this review suggests that it *may* be biphobic so proceed with caution? I haven’t read it so I can’t vouch but let me know)

Speculative Fiction: Lesbian MC

Huntress by Malinda Lo

Speculative Fiction: Bisexual MC

Love In the Time of Global Warming by Francesca Lia Block

Ash by Malinda Lo

Adaptation by Malinda Lo

Inheritance by Malinda Lo

Grasshopper Jungle by Andrew Smith

Coda by Emma Trevayne

Otherbound by Corinne Duyvis

Speculative Fiction: Gay MC

Proxy by Alex London

More Than This by Patrick Ness

Historical Fiction: Lesbian MC

Wildthorn by Jane Eagland

Silhouette of a Sparrow by Molly Beth Griffin

Queer/Not Otherwise Specified MC:

The Mermaid in Chelsea Creek by Michelle Tea

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