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shamelessly_mkpadulthood is hard, yo.
for so many reasons, some obvious and universal, but also especially for this one, possibly unique-to-me reason:
I’m not built for endurance.
My whole life (okay, so all of college definitely and to a lesser extent high school and earlier school years) I’ve kind of done these sprints of functioning and getting shit done - I do really well to start with, then start to lose speed and focus, and then there comes the inevitable crash and burn at the end of the semester where I frantically try to pull myself back together and scrape together whatever I can from the wreckage.
and that sucked. it sucked hardcore.
it was a vicious, unending cycle.
but at least my crashes were somewhat built into the ‘normal’ schedule. I always had a chance to put myself back together, even if once it took me a whole year.
now if I crash and burn, that’s it. I’m through.
I did it at my last waiting tables job. I could feel the crash coming and quit before it could happen.
It was a stupid, impulsive thing to do (I didn’t have another job lined up) and yet I regret it not-the-fuck-at-all.
I can’t do that with this job, I can’t.
I don’t even want to, not really - it’s a good job, I like the work okay, the frustrating shit has eased up a lot -
but I’m running too fast and I’m going to trip and fall and be gasping on the ground.
how can functioning as an independent adult be as impossible as this?
via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/1zcrAxd
for so many reasons, some obvious and universal, but also especially for this one, possibly unique-to-me reason:
I’m not built for endurance.
My whole life (okay, so all of college definitely and to a lesser extent high school and earlier school years) I’ve kind of done these sprints of functioning and getting shit done - I do really well to start with, then start to lose speed and focus, and then there comes the inevitable crash and burn at the end of the semester where I frantically try to pull myself back together and scrape together whatever I can from the wreckage.
and that sucked. it sucked hardcore.
it was a vicious, unending cycle.
but at least my crashes were somewhat built into the ‘normal’ schedule. I always had a chance to put myself back together, even if once it took me a whole year.
now if I crash and burn, that’s it. I’m through.
I did it at my last waiting tables job. I could feel the crash coming and quit before it could happen.
It was a stupid, impulsive thing to do (I didn’t have another job lined up) and yet I regret it not-the-fuck-at-all.
I can’t do that with this job, I can’t.
I don’t even want to, not really - it’s a good job, I like the work okay, the frustrating shit has eased up a lot -
but I’m running too fast and I’m going to trip and fall and be gasping on the ground.
how can functioning as an independent adult be as impossible as this?
via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/1zcrAxd
