shame is for other people

….you know what just occurred to me

it is entirely possible the way minesweeper seems to get more impossible and frustrating as it gets later and later is because my goddamn meds are wearing off

i mean like i know i shouldn’t blame everything on my brain chemistry

but it is so fantastically easy to win most of them in the morning and by evening it’s like lol no you fucked up oh look your hand slipped not the tile you wanted to click TOO BAD oh damn did you miscount did you leave that flag out of your logic-ing lol

and i feel like that is sort of suspicious.

via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/1tbbuPB

for those of you following along at home:

1) my headaches are back with a frequency and intensity they haven’t had in nearly six years

2) this may possibly be related to the new meds I’m on, but there are no guarantees of that and

3) I really fucking need these meds because I am mostly functioning all throughout the day after taking them but then it’s all ideation and self-loathing and northern virginia in the late evening.

4) all of this is compounded by the fact that work is currently hellish and I have gone from very distant supervision to micromanagement like ~that~ and don’t get along with or am able to communicate with my supervisor to boot

5) plus all the recent mom stuff altho good things happened there lately i should post about that at some point

6) and all those adulting things i’m working on like finding an apartment and NEW DOCTORS

tl;dr: my head hurts and there are no 504 plans for life.

via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/1ugaR6a

DONE

got up and dressed

took meds

made bed

went out and got coffee

watched episode of cardcaptor sakura

started weird woodworking project (nail polish display case! maybe. sort of.)

organized boxes of stuff (the containers, not the stuff itself)

finished new schedule for work and sent it out to coworkers

played kingdom of loathing

TO DO

eat something (cook hamburger helper???)

put away crock pot and sundry other items in kitchen

clean kitchen counters

clean up nail gems from where they spilled

dust and vacuum kitchen, living rooms, & stairs

cursory cleaning of top bathroom

cursory cleaning of bottom bathroom

clean up mess from weird wood project you started for no reason

go grocery shopping

figure out how to return bra and do so

put away all of the clean clothes all over your floor

do a load of laundry

cry forever

fun stuff I guess

via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/1qHj68e

okay in the past three hours i have:

started a load of laundry

put clean sheets on my bed

sorted through two boxes of keepsakes (jfc why did i feel the need to save the *envelopes*) and arranged all the stuffed animals from them nicely on a shelf

switched the laundry around and started a new load

collected all the trash and dishes in the bottom half of the house

I intended to also collect all the dishes and trash in the top half of the house, but I am tired and hungry now so I’m going to just tumble for a bit and deliberate with myself about the pros and cons of ordering a pizza

via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/1pBwrCp

watching Captain America: The Winter Soldier was totally like having a productive day working from home, right?

right???

via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/Vj5ib8

phone call managed. interrim instructions given. email to regular doc still needs writing and sending.

via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/1pCBPm9

I can’t stand the thought of leaving my littlest brother here it’s just not fair.

via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/1jTASTi

apparently my starter motor is bad. *headdesk* at least I have a better idea of what I’m looking for in a new car, so I’m at least on my way to getting a working set of wheels? am conferring with my parents as to whether or not it’s worth the 500 needed to fix my current car.

via:Tumblr http://ift.tt/1vtyQQN